megwan01.diaryland.com
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Therapy I am more lost than I have ever been. Sure I have ex boyfriends and prospectives, but never have I felt this lost. I have always known I would work with children, but now I am wondering "What if I dont work with kids, and I go into business?" My mom says that is what I will ultimately do, but Im not so sure. Its a big step for me to believe that I will marry somebody I meet AFTER college AND go into business. I have never believed in either. What is it like to marry someone I havent known for a long time? What is it like to not incorporate kids into the picture? What is it like to not be so anxious and introspective? Thats what me and my therapist are working on. I guess I have always had WAY too much anxiousness and stress...which makes sense, seeing as I still have panic attacks in the middle of the nights. She is trying to put me on mood stabilizers, which ought to be interesting. I dont know how I will react to them. Will I become numb? I dont want that at all. I want my emotions, but I dont want this ADD... My therapist says my ADD is linked to my emotions. I dont know what to think about that. Basically, I am lost. So I am resorting to thinking about my past. |
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� 20 years old |
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